I spent Christmas and New Year’s Eve with my large family; we spent the time together checking things out at Lobethal in the Adelaide Hills and on the foreshore at Semaphore. After these very traditional local Western celebrations we spent some time at home marking the New Year with prayers and blessings for the people who have passed away before us in the process of time which is realised in ritual with my Nepali family.
Towards the end of 2016 things were seeming more awkward and strange than usual for just about everyone in the family pointing in both cultural directions; the issues that were playing on my mind included my elderly mother having surgery a couple of days before Christmas, my own mental health which can get hard to handle sometimes as well as the obvious caution on mind related to world politics and how it seems to be shifting in a darker unknown direction. A few years ago I wrote about the way things were not going to shift backwards. Then I took to creating images instead of words.
Certain people passing away through the year tended to direct my thoughts towards their work and fine tune my own creative thoughts I think. I also noticed how much time I spent inside the black box. I have been thinking deeply about a story I want to tell; in order to do so I must appreciate why I want to tell the story. Does it need to be told? Could I possibly convince anyone else to invest in the story? It amounts to a lot of thinking. What I call deep thinking. It is like meditation at times and very inert. At other times it can be like total blackout; visions. Am I starting to become unstable? How can I tell?
In order to shift my thinking along I tend to create aids designed to help me construct what it is I need to say; pictures. I like pictures at the moment. I like the open quality of a picture. You look, you see what you see. You make what you can of it. You can caption it, detail it from your own perspective. I like that.
Being ‘inside the black box’ to me means being in relationship with a camera. Understanding there is a captured moment composed of content and elements.
In 2016 a couple of people passed away whom I see as part of a team I was very briefly involved with, and before that they were both contributors to a team that developed my creative thinking when I was younger. Vale to them and anyone I am unaware of who has passed; a lot of people I’m sure.